I'm not super into saying things or spit-balling ideas or talking to people about topics. I'm a quiet person, especially in class. The thing about quiet students in class, though, is that they are often walked all over by those few overpowering, overbearing, energy-draining loudmouths. You know who I'm talking about: class clowns.When the professor asks how the moon was formed, they're the kid who shouts out "aliens." Or another student's comment reminds them of a "super dope" story that happened to them once, but you really just "had to be there" to get it. This is something I feel so strongly about, it both busts my hump and grinds my gears when class time is wasted by mind-numbing commentary from the peanut gallery. And it seems everyone's a comedian these days.
I see how this looks. I, an aspiring comedian, am coming across like some comedy elitist, hypocritical hoodrat with some serious nerve right now. But I'm not shoving my comedic ideology down your throat while you're trying to learn. As we sit in a class that we pay an exorbitant amount of money to attend, the minute your mediocre joke touches my auditory cortex, you can count on me to be all of America to your Lebron James circa July 2010.
Imagine: you're in your final class on Friday. The only thing separating you from a sweaty, hazy night in a fraternity basement is a discussion question posed by your professor regarding ethical practices in media. And he is not letting anyone leave till it's answered. That classroom is more silent than Reliant Stadium after Janet Jackson's wardrobe malfunction at Super Bowl XXXVIII. Always one to strike, Mr. Funny-Pants swoops in like a hawk to a carcass and says, "Well, I volunteer as tribute. As far as ethical practices go, the only thing more unethical than Victoria's Secret models having to wear clothes all the time is you keeping us from party-rocking." Woah, everybody step back. The grandmaster of comedy is in the building.
Class clowns are horribly disruptive to the learning process, and they don't just affect the class' top students. Allow me to break it down: I would consider myself to be an intellectual type to the extent that I wear glasses. I'm a professor's academic worst nightmare. Homework and grades just aren't my scene. I read the Dean's List solely so I know who to beat up at the bike racks after school. And although I am most certainly not my class' valedictorian, I am offended by that wisecracking goon who thinks I want to hear their sub-par joke over the professor's lecture of what is on next week's test. They feel their thoughts and words are worth more than anyone else's in the room. Frankly, I find class clowns to be disrespectful to both their professor and fellow students.
Being funny is great. I'm all for jokes. Jokes are super. I've dedicated my life to jokes. Like everything else, though, there is a time and a place. I am no virtuoso in timing dictation, but I'm pretty sure the time to hear some jokester going on about the Furby Apocalypse is not while our class is trying to learn.
Got something that busts your hump? Email me at maevemcdonough_2015@depauw.edu or tweet me @MaeveMcDonough and let me know.
- McDonough is a sophomore from Glenn Ellyn, Ill., majoring in communication.