Oh, the luxuries of the Lilly Physical Education and Recreation Center

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This summer, I went to go work out at a gym that was clean, spacious, and had many perks. I was a member at Lifetime Fitness, and for $40 a month, I had access to a hot tub, sauna, top of the line workout equipment and towels that I kept taking home on purpose while pretending it was an accident. It was awful. What kind of a gym is clean and spacious?
Quite a few times, I would run on the treadmill only to find out that there were freshly-cleaned towels and an always-available clean up spray bottle to wipe off any sweat. Ew. Worst of all, when I would need to use the equipment, there was always something available.
About three times a week, I head to The Lilly Physical Education and Recreation Center. (Don't tell yourself you go more. You don't. You say you will, but you don't.) Until two minutes ago, I just called it "Lilly," but after lazily Googling it, I have learned there is so much more to the name.
The name is just the beginning of it. I spoke previously about my horrifying experience at Lifetime Fitness. Luckily, because there are no other gyms in the area, I get to enjoy the luxuries of LIPER. Not only does LIPER cater to abbreviation lovers, but to those that love being around other people. Several times, I have worked out so closely to other Lilly-Lovers (LL's), that I could hear every lyric to Trapt's "Headstrong."
Much credit should be given to the engineers who put the gym together. Every piece of equipment is spaced just enough away from other pieces of equipment that it can be considered "safe."
One of my favorite activities is to pace back and forth awkwardly while waiting for someone to finish using the machine I need. What could be better than having a limited amount of machines? Could it be the old ratty towels that disappear by 10 a.m.? Or maybe the 10 square feet allotted for abdominal exercises?
And the lockers! Have you ever seen more magnificent keepers of keys, wallets and freshmen lanyards? I think not. I was once lucky enough to get a locker that did not open on the code I use for it every time. After 25 minutes of wandering around and looking for someone that looks like they might work there, I got to take care of it myself. Using my great muscular strength (but mostly leverage), I pried the locker open. Because we all want lockers that can't remember our codes but can be broken into.
As bright and positive as this article/blog/whatever-The-DePauw-calls-these-articles-to-make-them-sound-more-hip may seem, I must mention a complaint from a fellow LL.
While getting super ripped and buff and stuff, I was approached by an LL.
"You should do one of your articles about the lack of music in here," he said. Because I was a fool and had forgotten my headphones, I wholeheartedly agreed.
"Yeah, cause. ... it's like. ... you know. ... awkward without music." He smiled, and then slowly backed away. My uncomfortable moment of the day completed, I went back to my workout and narrowly avoided the person doing arm exercises two inches away from my face.

- Jorgenson is a senior from Shawnee, Kansas, majoring in English writing and film studies.